The Planet of the Apes Meets Online Poker
I’m sure everyone at one time or another has seen a painting of a group of gentlemanly canines engaged in an anthropomorphic game of poker as created by Cassius Coolidge in his wonderful series of poker playing dog paintings. But check this out, the artists whimsicality was not entirely removed from reality. You may be nave enough to think that chips and chimps cannot play together as a team and it sounds more like something out of a Douglas Adams novel. Should you ever play online poker with a player who has an ape photo for his icon, it may not have been just a player with an odd sense of humor, the dude that took your money by his excellent play may really be a poker playing primate. I kid you not. Apes can do a lot more than wield tools in this twenty first century of technological advances and “intelligence explosion” they can also beat you at online poker.
Primate Programming Inc has established that great apes (sharing 97% of their DNA with us) make efficient IT specialists. Individuals are employed by PPI, undergo training and offer their services to PPI clients for peanuts. A later PPI discovery was that the same employees, for purposes of pastime or secondary sources of income, are capable of being taught to play online poker, evincing particular talent for no-limit Texas Hold’em.
These card-playing apes are drawn to no-limit poker due to their natural bent for playful displays of aggression. So, this particular feature enables them to be particularly proficient at aggressive bluffing. In no-limit games, any player can bet his entire wad at any time, a strategy (?) requiring risky, aggressive behavior and the ability to retain a poker face while bluffing.
Since online poker games are anonymous, this helps our poker playing primates. You cannot determine who is of the human persuasion versus the ape persuasion. The human types have actually lost thousands of dollars to a player who played the early rounds with betting very little money and showed lame cards on a regular basis then out of the blue bet big time, of course, everyone in the game called, and the big time better revealed aces. Our winner was undoubtedly jumping up and down and pounding his chest in glee.
Apparently, and not coincidentally, the primate poker players early employment as computer programmers led them to independently, according to PPI, create programs to aid and abet their poker game. PPI is not talking about the specific contents of these programs. These apes could have a professional online poker career, but that is not their nature. Once outside the office, they will probably neglect their training and revert to being the real primates they are, propelling themselves with their arms from branch to branch and climbing fences. In any case as long as they are paid, fed and have their girlfriends and boyfriends nearby, they will continue with their poker games. Authors of no-limit poker books should take note. They may have to come up with some rewrites.
For the past several years, Norm McAuliffe, a Yale biology Phd and the scientist heading the research team behind the discovery of programmer apes, has been investing money and effort into a Primate Poker Inc, “hiring” profitable ape-players to play for money in rotating shifts, 24 hours a day. He has been quoted as saying: “I’m completely committed to this business model. It is reasonable to say I am “all in”.
The author of this article plays poker online and receives Rakeback at Absolute Poker. He is also a contributer at Rakeback Solution.
Sports Betting Site Reviews & Ratings
Today's Recommended Sports Betting Site( ) -
Bodog Sportsbook
Get all the latest lines on all the major sports: MLB, NBA, NFL, PGA, Tennis, Boxing and more...
Sportsbook-watch.com Rating 9.4/10
Sign Up Bonus 10%
Referral Bonus 20%
Sportsbook.Com Sports Betting
Sportsbook.com has everything a gambler dreams of - sportsbook, poker, and casino. When you're looking for action, it just doesn't get any better than at Sportsbook.com. So what are you waiting for? Start betting and winning today!
Sportsbook-watch.com Rating 9.2/10
Sign Up Bonus 50%
Reload Bonus 10%
Sportsbook.com Sportsbook Review
Sportsbetting.com Sports Betting
Sportsbetting.com is one of the most established books in the business with some of the best sportsbetting odds available online. They also have a great casino and poker site!
Sportsbook-watch.com Rating 8.9/10
Sign Up Bonus 20%
Reload Bonus 5%
Sportsbetting.com Sportsbook Review
Superbook Sports Betting
One of the easiest sportsbooks to get around for new bettors. Superbook has a great clean look, fabulous customer service and a nice clean interface for easy navigation
Sportsbook-watch.com Rating 8.7/10
Sign Up Bonus 50%
Reload Bonus 5%
Superbook.com Sportsbook Review
PlayersOnly Sports Betting
Offering US Bettors a chance to bet on Sports, Poker or Casino Games. An easy to navigate site with good 24/7 customer service and great odds. Dubber' the world's sexiest sportsbook'!
Sportsbook-watch.com Rating 8.5/10
Sign Up Bonus 50%
Reload Bonus 5%
PlayersOnly.com Sportsbook Review
Intertops.com Sports Betting
Intertops were one of the first sportsbooks to take a bet online and have proved themselves to offer a wide variety of betting options on every major sporting event worldwide. Their payments out and customer service are second to none in the industry. Intertops also offer an excellent casino and multiplayer poker games.
Sportsbook-watch.com Rating 8.1/10
Sign Up Bonus $20 bet
Reload Bonus 10%
Today's sportsbetting headlines -
| Today's Recommended Sportsbook ( ) |
|---|
 |
These are the top sports gambling websites offering the best gambling offers and special promotions currently. We offer sportsbook reviews of all of these recommended websites at sportsbook-watch.
Looking to bet on sports? Looking for the best betting lines? Check out our recommended sports betting websites. They offer the best sportsbetting odds and deals online - guaranteed!
Also check out our completely free sportsbetting guide for you to download
| Today's Recommended Poker Website( ) |
|---|